Proverbs: Lessons in Wisdom – 08.07.22

The Wisdom of Marriage

Proverbs 2:16-17, 5:18-20, 10:18, 12:4, 16:25, 17: 1-2, 17:19, 18:22, 24:3-4

Connect:  What has been your view of marriage from your family or from society? How do you think society views marriage these days? Do you know a good marriage and what made it good in your eyes?

Engage:  Read some of the verses on marriage – what do you think Scripture is saying in these verses on marriage?

A marriage is like building a house – it needs a good foundation strong walls, those things that will keep the house going along time – it takes the things we don’t often see Water heater, furnace. Not just the decorations or landscaping but those things that help the house run at its best. Zach talked about continual upkeep and those things that are a priority to keep the house secure.  
A good marriage requires wisdom and knowledge – How do you grown your marriage in wisdom and knowledge?

Zach shared the Home of the Marriage is built on:

1. Covenant
   1. What does covenant look like in your marriage

Proverbs 2:17
Adultery is not just against a partner but also against God – in what ways do we see Adultery  played out in marriage– it is not having a affair
.Some people ask who they are and expect their feelings to tell them. Some people ask who they are and expect visions of their ideal self to tell them. But our visions can only tell us what we want to be, not what we are
Lewis B. Smedes

What do you think this quote is saying?  

2. Friendship

If we do not nurture the friendship of marriage, we forget we liked this person. It is critical to have to have friendship. What attracted you to your spouse? If you are not married, What do you look for in a friendship?
There are elements of Friendship
Time
Forgiveness
Mission
How do these 3 words play out in your marriage or friendships that you have?
What do you do to make time for each other?  How do you practice forgiveness with each other?  Do you champion each other in what they feel they have been called to by God?
Tim Keller quote, To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial; to be known and not loved is our greatest fear. – How does this quote play out in your relationships?

Stanley Hauwerwas- safety brings honesty, learning how to love and care for the stranger to whom you find yourself married. – Have your experienced this in your marriage and what does that look like for you?

3. Physical intimacy  

There are 2 views of physical intimacy

1. It is a need that needs to be satisfied – not a big deal. It’s just sex.
2. Sex is bad, don’t talk about it – don’t think about it

Which side of these 2 views did you fall on growing up or are in now?

What do you think of the statement if you are not good friends, you are not going to have good sex?  How does that sit with you?
Proverbs 5:18-20,-
God gave the gift of intimacy –

Proverbs 12:4
If we are not giving our relationships to God marriage /friendships – can feel like decay in our bones
Where have you felt decay in your bones?

Eph 5:32-33- It is a mystery- It is ordained by God – Christ and the church. Christ made a decision to love us when we were sinners. Marriage comes out in the gospel. Where do you see your marriage showing the gospel?

Apply:   Where do you need to grow in your marriage/ friendships?  What is one thing you can do this week to love your spouse or a friend well?  If your marriage is in trouble, who are you going to call to be honest with where your marriage is and what steps are you going to take to address the problem?